Torching the Normal - Busy Making Other Plans Blog

I met this amazing family while staying at A. I. duPont (Blog Link). Our sons' rooms were two doors down (I know that's a cheap 90's pop music reference but hey...why not). Like so many of our neighbors, we walked a lot more than the same hallway. Both Nate and my son have developmental issues which make the dynamics of leukemia slightly different. Like his parents, leukemia was not the first bit of challenging news our family faced. And that is how many of my son and my treatment-neighbors think of this cancer, as a challenge.

Each parent comes to understand that they have only two options: face it or flee. Were we to flee then we would be running away from our own children. This reality makes the days when you are overwhelmed and can't face everything much harder. Each parent deals with this reality in their own way and yes, some do flee. Don’t judge them; instead pray for them. Imagine the torture they are enduring. But the parents I most respect are the ones who know when they need to get a cup of coffee or a visit home. 

Finding one's center in a world full of chaos is not always possible. You might have forgotten how to find it or can't afford the time to look, but it is there. It is nearby and can be touched by performing simple acts of normality. For me it was walking to the food pantry and getting a carton of milk or a yogurt, or making a peanut butter and honey sandwich for my son. In my mind it was like going to the grocery store, and it gave me the break I needed to think about things I could not think about in front of my son. It was also a hunter/gatherer act that helped to assure both of us that I could still provide for him. Believe me, there were quite a few walks to the pantry.

Touching normality does not need to be any grand gesture and, face it, who would have the energy to do it anyway? For each parent there is a different way of facing the cancer storm. I love the openness and kindness in my friend’s blog. It is full of those moments. I also love that there is a happy ending (http://busymakingotherplansblog.org/). If you need an uplifting biography about how one family copes with more than they thought they might be able to -- then please have a read. And if you are in need of ‘touching normality’ then just look up and around. There is something near you that will help.

PG Somerset